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Prove. Them. Wrong.

Just goes to show you that no matter how much you plan, people see the dwarfism first. Don’t let it get into your head.  Don’t let that doubt fill your head to make you believe you can’t.  YOU CAN!

Planning my son’s birthday at the City pool, I think, “Awesome. He loves swimming and it’s still hot outside.  A pool party would be perfect.  So, I make my list, check it twice, send out invites, buy the cake, pack up the stuff and go.  We get to the pool and my son is all excited.  His friends start to arrive and the kids get in the pool.  DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince’s Summertime is playing in my head while everyone is enjoying the perfect weather and everything is going as planned.

Suddenly, I’m approached by one of the lifeguards.  The record scratches. They say that my son needs to be supervised by a parent because they don’t feel he’s safe in the water.  I begin to question what he means by that like is he being rough, etc.  No, it’s just that they don’t think he’s safe. We asked what he meant by that. He said they didn’t feel safe and that anyone 7 years and younger needs to be accompanied by an adult. I said he’s 8 years old. Surprised, he said, “Well, they don’t feel safe with him in the pool and he has to pass a swim test.” I said, “Well, then all of his friends are here and they’re 7 years old. Why don’t they have to?” We went back and forth discussing the policy and I said that he is completely water safe. The unspoken concern was that he had a disability that they were uncomfortable with. The lifeguard said, “Ok, then you want me to have everyone take a swim test?” I said yes. After all, you should not just pick out one child. Every child who is in the pool should abide by the City rules.

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Normally, I just fly through my life not thinking of my size. Afterall, my size does not define me. I am a mother, sister, cousin, niece, friend, artist, advisor, parent, activist, meddler, peddler, dishwasher, taxi driver, peace maker, marketer, public servant, etc. All the things that define you, define me. Your size, color, ethnicity does not define you. It is a part of you as it is for me. And there are moments when I’m flying through my days to get things done when I think of other people. Today it was the Parents of Little People. I thought, “Look! I do all this at my size.” But, then I thought, do I really need to point out some boring trip to Costco? Well, someone just put the stakes on the table when they said dwarfism is a pain in the ass. Uh, have you ever had kids, a spouse, and a household to run? Yeah, don’t tell me about dwarfism being a pain in the ass. It’s friggin’ 96 degrees and I’m running through Costco with kids and not complaining about my life. I’m just doing it because I ran out of Mexican Shredded Cheese and kids need quesadillas!!!

Here’s the cool thing about life: someone is always going to be there to help you or you’re going to figure it out for yourself. On my to-do list for today: go get mini-fridge from hubby to return to Costco, then get the Costco list done— with kids in 96 degree weather. Yup, totally do able. How did you get that mini-fridge that ain’t so mini to an LP into your van by yourself? Hubby just asked his co-worker to put it into the van. The cool thing about being a nice person is that nice people will do something simple like that for you. And that’s how relationships start. It also helps that I knew I would find a Costco employee gathering shopping carts in the front to get a flat cart and bring the mini-fridge to customer service. Why? Because they get paid to do that.

Ask anyone. Shopping at Costco with a full list and two kids is like: I’d rather stay at home and wait for the husband to help. Well, not me. I am a mama on the go and I gotta get my list done. So, with two kids in tow, fighting every 10 minutes and stopping every 15 minutes I get my list done. I’m pulling my cart from the front because it’s easier to see and I don’t run over my kids who are walking ever so slowly because they’re fighting and trying to eat samples. I climb on edges of shelving or refrigerated areas and just grab my stuff and go. My cart is filled to the max with huge packages of toilet paper and paper towels with perishibles sweating, waiting to get home.

It’s almost dinnertime and it dawns on me. CRAP! I need to feed the family. I start thinking in my Plan A, Plan B, Plan C, mode. Every mom does. I ran out of the yummy chicken I made in the crock-pot last night. Darn, Plan A out the window. Plan B: I have left over brown rice and some pasta I made. BINGO! Costco rotisserie chicken is not the best thing in the world, but my Plan C was to feed them Costco hotdogs and pizza. At least, I’m not feeding them frosting, right? I get my chicken, cart, and children to the cashier and go. They even had someone bring the cart to the exit to hand off to another cart guy to bring my stuff to the car and load it in. Cha-ching!

Morals of the story:
Be nice and people will be nice to you. Be attentive and think ahead. Always have a plan or four. Last, and this is key: Shop at places with awesome customer service and accessibility like Costco. It’s no wonder they are one of the Top 25 Companies To Work For.

And when I got home, all four of us, kids included, helped unload and put away the groceries. That is what you call teamwork and family. The only dwarf moment: I sat in my son’s Ikea armchair and realized even with my achon butt, I can fit into it quite nicely without my legs dangling. I just hope it doesn’t break. 😀


After over 15 years together, one thing my husband has learned is that a Filipina’s temper is the worst of it’s kind. As a people, we shower you with good hospitality, a big loving family (with drama and gossip), and we will give you the shirt off our backs. But, once you do us wrong, you’d better watch your back. And once you do me wrong: Get the F*ck Out of the Way.

Camera phones and technology (social media, etc.) is changing the human race for the better and for the worse. Physiologically, our eyes will worsen and we will have less fine motor skills. Socially, we are becoming less sensitive to each other’s space. Kids don’t talk to adults the way they used to. Adults feel they can take a photo of anything and anyone that’s “odd” or “interesting”.

Lately, it’s happened to me more often than I’d like and it’s not because we’ve been in the news for the World Dwarf Games 2013. Stupid people have taken pictures because it’s “oh so interesting” that I’m getting out of my car in my swim suit after going to the pool with my kids or working out with my son at his karate class. It is a good thing that we have freedom of speech in the USA, but people have come to abuse it. Our forefathers did not know that technology would change our values. Nor did they intend that amendment to include ridiculing people for their differences.

I don’t take photos of anyone besides my family and friends. Pay it forward and do the same. Maybe we’ll bring society back to where it used to be — respectful and sensitive.

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When I envisioned the Dwarfparents.com blog, I also had an idea for a blog from my perspective from the different facets of where I stand.  I was unaware of my diverse background until college where I learned to celebrate it and keep it as my strength.  Dwarf Parents was a joint project with my husband to leave a breadcrumb trail for our dwarfism community and family.  But, I could share so much more of where I’ve come from.  So, onto the next chapter, welcome to Enana Mama.